I was heartbroken the English authorities kicked me out of the country for the third time. The first time I was on a student Visa, and I forgot to actually attend college. The second time is when my Visa expired. The third time was when my online love connection fell apart right at London’s, Heathrow Airport.
More than ever I was determined to marry an Englishman and live in England. The fact that I wasn’t’ an English citizen, had no affect on my goals. This was a life long dream since childhood, nothing was going to stand in my way.
After my second disastrous encounter with England’s immigration, I decided my online dating would surely put me in a position to become an English citizen by way of marriage.
After several months of hot and heavy online conversations with a young man we’ll call Chad, I packed my bags and headed for England for the third time. I had extremely high hopes our relationship would work out.
Once I arrived at London’s Heathrow Airport, I was filled with excitement, and overwhelmed with grief, all within a span of 90 seconds.
As I waited my turn to get off the aircraft, I was filled with joy, at seeing a man I had come to care for deeply, online. I had no idea that our first meeting would be our last nor that a man whom I had never met before could generate such disappointment, embarrassment, and emotional pain in my life.
When Chad saw me in person for the first time, his face turned to a frown. He looked very upset, yet his reaction was reserved, as the English are noted for. As it turned out, Chad hadn’t really understood, when I told him I was a big girl.
Because my weight, at that time, was around 240 pounds, he believed me to be obese and explained that he could never love a woman who was as large as myself. I thanked him for his honesty and proceeded to walk away, as he was still forming the words to say how sorry he was.
I had nowhere to go, and felt totally empty inside. Somewhere between the gate at the airport and the baggage claim area, I found my confidence and determination. I called the family I’d worked for previously while in England to ask if I could spend a couple nights. They were happy to hear from me and insisted on coming to the airport to pick me up.
I later learned they were having problems with their Nanny, and wanted to employ me again, for as long as I could stay.
After about a year, the fact that I was in England illegally, was discovered once again. And I was asked to leave, for the third time.
When I returned to California, I placed my fate in the hands of Internet dating websites once again. I was determine to be the wife of an Englishman. Nothing was going to change my determination. Nothing. They say insanity is doing the same thing over and over and expecting different results, yet this is how many people succeed. I knew within my heart, someday, someway, there would be positive result. Each day, I checked the dating websites, looking for the Englishmen who would be open to dating a full-figured woman from the US.
It was not long before I met Jeffery online. I was very careful in describing myself, my heart couldn’t afford another misunderstanding. I made sure Jeffery understood what a “big girl” actually meant.
We were both excited about the possibilities of our new relationship. Although he complained about the monthly fees on the dating website, he stuck it out long enough for us to make a solid connection.
This time, the man whom I later married, traveled to the United States. He loved the US, he loved California, and best of all, he was open to loving me.
We married, a year after his initial visit to California. We were never able to get our families in the same country at the same time, so we had a wedding ceremony in the US and in England.
Of course we decided to live in England. Once we found a suitable apartment, we started to save the necessary monies to apply for my English citizenship.
Much to our surprise, the fees for citizenship almost tripled without our knowledge. When we spoke to the authorities about helping us to make arrangements, we encountered opposition. To make a long story short, I left England again, due to Immigration laws.
However, on my fourth departure from a country that I so desperately wanted to be a part of, I departed with one of London’s most loveable bachelors. We have a young son, and we now live in the San Francisco Bay Area (2010) Perhaps, one day, I will be allowed to become a citizen of England, but I’m not holding my breath.
This is a True Life Story as told to Sandy Ingram